STAR WANDERINGS

I thought I can, somehow, avoid the messiness of human interaction.  I assumed if I control the circumstances and guard what is precious to me,  I can somehow outwit the universe.  At one point in my life, I consciously decided to stop crying to get myself out of a difficult experience. It took me a few years to be able to welcome tears in my life again, to start melting this hard rocky mountain inside of myself, slowly loosening the cold controlling grip on my heart. Vulnerability is what makes us human. One way or the other we will get hurt. Naturally, we long for wholesome experiences that will nourish and support us. To separate the wheat from the chaff, we need to engage in the whole spectrum of experience, taste all the fruits we receive as a result of our actions. Sometimes the fruit is too ripe, past its prime, slowly disintegrating, yet by tasting it we are learning an important lesson. We are learning what does not feel good, what we don´t want to taste anymore....

  We can only do so much - research, rationalize, organize, prioritize in an attempt to cover all possible scenarios, to avoid failure but at some point this endeavor becomes pointless. We come to a point when there is no more we can do. We need to hand our dream to the Universe and say “I gave it my everything, I did my best, it is not in my power to decide the outcome of this, I am handing this over to the higher power - I TRUST, I have FAITH, I BELIEVE. Constant doubt is the harbinger of growth, prosperity, of wisdom gained over time. Reason and belief, doubt and trust - eternal tension of Mercury and Jupiter. Mars in Gemini has been tripping backward in its retrograde motion for a while, shapeshifting through Mercury’s territory and setting multiplicity as the current operating mode. You better be ready to act on things when they come up. It is what it is, this is a problem- solving time. Things take twice as much time to figure out and more often then not you’ll have to get ba...